Technology and Kids

Recently the Huffington Post published an article, 10 Reasons Why Handheld Devices Should Be Banned For Children Under the Age of 12. Although the article gives some great research, most of the article is over-generalized and the points I do actually agree with seem like common sense.

The article, as well as the American Academy of Pediatrics, recommends no technology at all until 2 years old. As is everything with parenting, I find recommendations such as this bullshit because each child is different. I have a two-year-old who is amazing with technology. She was introduced to Baby Einstein videos at 6 months old, started playing iPad games at a year, and watches tv a couple times a week. Guess what? By the time she was 14 months she consistently said 26 words. She is not even 2 1/2 years old and knows all of her basic colors, can count to 20, recognizes most upper and lower case letters, knows some letter sounds, is working on basic sight words, and knows all of her basic shapes. Not only that, she is an extremely social child, she LOVES books, reading, and being read to, she has always been able to listen and follow multiple-step directions, and has amazing verbal, fine motor, and gross motor skills for her age. When she watches tv shows like Team Umizoomi and Super Why, she is able to follow along and interact with the show. Her amazing memory allows her to memorize lines from books, tv shows, and games and her creative ability allows her to recreate these scenes later in the day using her dolls and other toys. Withholding technology from her, in my opinion, would have put her at a disadvantage. It is something she is interested in, something she is good at, and therefore something she needs exposure to. In my opinion, she uses more critical thinking skills in learning how to open and navigate the iPad and iPad apps individually than just simply picking up the toys available in her room. She does wonderfully with a balance of technology and creative play. In no way do I think access to technology hindered her imagination. In fact, I think it created a groundwork to build her creative play off of. She is able to use what she has seen in tv and movies to make-believe and play independently. That being said, every night we have dinner as a family at the dinner table with no technology, she does NOT get any technology in her room or at night at all, and we limit access to technology daily in order to create that balance.

My soon-to-be one year old is a completely different story. It is hard to really tell at this point, but so far he has zero interest in anything technology. So, his exposure to technology is minimal. I see no point in exposing him to something he has no interest in at the time being. He would much rather play with toys than watch tv. He looks at the iPad as a cool thing his sister uses sometimes- but when providing him with a baby app, he throws it (like he throws everything these days....). He will probably not be ready for technology until at least 2 years old. Like I said... all children are different.

Digital Dementia? Please. My husband started using computers daily at 8 years old. He started learning code at 9. His dad gave him a computer and a book on code and off he went. By the time he graduated high school, he was fluent in 7 different computer languages. Now, he is 28 and is one of the only people in the country who can do what he does. He spent his entire childhood on a computer. He does not have social issues, memory issues, or any other issues attributed to the awfulness that is technology. Instead he has a unique skill-set that has companies BEG him for jobs. Think about anyone you know that was into computers and video games as a child. Chances are they have a higher paying job than you.

Children NEED to be exposed to technology. At what age, depends on the child. If you do not provide access to technology, you are failing your child. Children should be somewhat fluent on a computer before they reach kindergarten. Children who do not have a fundamental understanding of how a computer works will not make it in this technology-based world. So rather than LIMITING technology, we should instead be promoting using technology to their advantage.

Provide children with apps that promote coding skills. This article has examples of apps that give children programming skills. "Even if a student never intends to pursue programming as a career, learning to code will still foster problem-solving skills, spark creativity and enhance logical thinking." My husband and I intend for both of our children to learn the basics of computer programming. Raegan is only 2 and already plays the game Kodable. It is coding in the most fundamental form- learning to think like a programmer.

Play games and video games that are educational and promote strategy and teamwork. There is nothing wrong with family game night on a digital device. Children are still challenged, learn about competition, and are spending time with family. They learn to take turns and play fair. They learn about teamwork, strategies, and friendship.

Parents should make sure children make the most of technology available. Create a balance and make sure digital technology does not replace conventional learning. Technology should be used to ENHANCE learning, therefore creating more opportunities for children as they grow up in a technical world. By the time our children are adults, they will use technology for EVERYTHING.

In summary, be smart and use common sense when introducing technology to children. Don't throw them in front of a tv all day. Don't allow a tween access to social media. Don't allow your child to play their DS or iPhone throughout dinner. Do promote learning and imaginative play outside of technology. Do allow your child access to apps and games that promote strategic thinking. Do provide your child with the tools necessary to keep up with changing technology. You know your children- do what is best for them.

Worst Parts of Parenting

There are so many great things about being a parent. It is amazing how a little person so small and needy can become your complete world overnight. It is truly hard to put into words the wonderful aspects of parenthood.

That being said... I can easily describe the worst parts- many of which people do not prepare you for.

Here is my personal list of the worst parts of parenting:


1. Cutting baby fingernails. I hate it. Like really hate it. When they are a newborn they tell you to file the nails down... really?? I tried that- the file did absolutely nothing. The kid still had sharp, pointy claws that cut their face and more importantly, my boob. It seriously felt like my cat was clawing my boobs during feedings. Not cool. Not only that, but newborn finger nails are TINY. And extremely thin. Trying to get the nail clipper in between the nail and fingertip without cutting the finger off always gives me an anxiety attack. Which is why my boobs were always clawed.... As if cutting newborn fingernails was tough.... once the baby becomes somewhat mobile... game over. You now have to get the baby to sit still enough in your lap to cut 10 fingers... I mean fingernails... while they are squirming around and trying to get away... and probably crying. So. Much. Fun.

2. Changing a squirmy baby's diaper.  Once a baby is mobile, you have to wrestle them squirming around like crazy while changing poopy diapers. At times I have had to hold my son by his legs, holding them in the air as his body bends upside down into positions I didn't think were possible. Other times, diaper changes involve having to pin him to the floor or changing table as his body tries to maneuver side-ways and upside down. You would think they would be happy to have the poop cleaned... but no- being independent and mobile is much more important. Needless to say, no matter how much effort I put into keeping them from getting shit (literally) everywhere, it always ends up getting all over the baby's and my clothes as well as the changing table. Baby for the win.


3. Getting into car seat. I have written about this before. Kids are born with the ability to resist car seats. Even little tiny newborns who can hardly move find a way to manipulate themselves into a position making it impossible to strap them in. Once they are older, getting into the car takes a good twenty minutes and about every ounce of patience you have. Bending themselves backwards, screaming, flailing arms... you need 6 arms in order to secure the straps correctly. Oh, and not to mention the fact that your toddler will run from you seat hopping because she is a big girl and doesn't need a car seat.

4. Teething. I do not think I can say enough about how much I despise teething. It makes my kids cranky. It makes them not sleep. It makes them scream. It makes them not eat. It lasts FOREVER. When Rory's final tooth comes in, I am going to throw a huge party!

5. Middle of the night wakings after sleep training. I believe in sleep training. Luckily I have two amazing sleepers. They both responded awesome to sleep training. But that makes it that much worse when there are interruptions to their wonderful sleep habits. Once you are used to getting some sleep- going back to multiple night wakings is awful. And you would think it only happens every couple months... WRONG! Sleep regressions are no joke. They happen around 4 months, 9 months, one year, 18 months.... And they last for WEEKS. Add that to the nighttime wakings due to teething, growth spurts, and whenever they get sick... you should basically just expect to be awake multiple times a night for the rest of your life.

6. Pooping in the bath tub. This is no joke. And it does happen. And it sucks. Especially if the tub is full of toys when it happens. Or when there are two kids in the tub. So gross.

Raegan's Room

Life has been crazy the last couple months. I was coaching a high school swim team during the afternoons, so the hubby was on dinner and bed duty almost every night. On top of that- he was going to work extra early so he could leave in time for me to go to coaching. We have also had a couple weeks of colds and ear infections and UTI's..... Needless to say, we have all been exhausted. 

Now that life seems to be returning to normal, I can get back to work on my projects- this blog included!! 

I have been having fun finding cute, cheap projects for the kids' rooms and the playroom. 

Here is a tour of Raegan's big girl room!

This stuffed animal holder is my most recent project. They are planters from Lowes. All I did was hang them up on the wall and now she has a place to put her baby dolls and stuffed animals rather than piling them in a basket. 

Raegan moved to a "big girl bed" when she was about 20 months old. She used to have a railing on the bed but the hubby broke it when she REALLLLLLY wanted him to lay with her. She never really needed it anyway because the bed is so low to the ground to begin with. 

Also shown is my other project- IKEA spice rack bookshelves! All I did was paint them and put them on the wall. Both Raegan and Rory are easily able to access their books. Rory especially loves putting the books back onto the shelf.... 

The rest of the pics are just other pics of her room. 

Three Better Not Be Worse....

Recently I read this article about how three is worse than two. Honestly, with Raegan, there is no way. I will have to move away or send her off to boarding school if that is the case.

However, reading the points in the article, Raegan acts more like the three year old described than the two year old. So I am either happy because she acts like the "worse age" already and I should have nothing new to worry about later... or I can be scared that these traits will become completely amplified.

#1. Three year olds never shut up.

I love that Raegan is as verbal as she is. I really do. And most of the time it is completely adorable. But honestly, now she has gotten to the point where she tells us we are wrong, corrects things we say, and is starting to talk to Rory how we do. How endearing. We were driving in the car and were next to a coach bus. "What's that, Mommy?" That is a bus. "No, it's not. It's a truck." Then why did you ask? "You have an orange crayon." Actually I have a pink crayon. "No, it's orange." Okay... "Look, a skeleton!" That's a monster. "No, it's a skeleton."   I have to stop myself from arguing with my know-it-all two year old constantly. And who knew 2-year-olds knew how to talk back? Please be careful with that glass Christmas decoration Raegan. "I AM being careful...." The girl has a tude. Also, she can not handle when she has to wait to talk. So she continuously repeats herself over and over and over and over again, louder and louder until we acknowledge her. So annoying. And frustrating. Oh, and best of all.... Everything is a song. She sings her way through her day like a real-life member of Glee. "I'm pooping on the pooooooottttttyyyyyyy." "I'm eating my food, I'm eating my food..." These are just samples of the lyrics to her on-going collection off her soon-to-be released self-titled album.

#2. Temper Tantrums

This girl can tantrum with the best of them. They can be seriously intense. Screaming. Flailing. Head banging. We have been working on them, and they have gotten better. She is starting to understand our expectations of her and that she does not always get to do what she wants. We use deep breaths, time outs, breaks in her room to calm down, and ignoring. That is a post for another day.

#3. Picky Eaters

Raegan used to eat everything. Every veggie, fruit, meat, you name it, she loved it. It made mealtime easy.  She would just eat whatever we ate. Now, she is more picky. She could eat chicken and rice for every meal. She won't eat red meat. She will, however, eat fruit and at least take bites of veggies. If you ask her what her favorite food is she will say candy. Great parenting over here...

#4. Bath time

Currently, our new bath activity is pretending the bathtub is a pool. My kids take a bath together. It is a tiny tub. Picture Raegan sprawled out on her back practicing keeping her head back in the water while Rory tries to dodge her flailing legs while simultaneously wrestling with her. It's a beautiful site. And not very productive.

          

     

#5. Potty-trained

I was against potty-training early. Having diapers is SOOO much easier. It eliminates the "need to go right now" factor. Your life does not revolve around your child and their potty breaks. You do not have to constantly remember to remind her to go to the bathroom. You do not have to take breaks every hour no matter where you are in order to find a bathroom. You do not constantly live in fear that the one time she has an accident will be at the MOST inappropriate place. Raegan was a potty-training master. However, she is still young. She still has accidents. She still needs to be reminded to use the bathroom. So, basically her toileting needs control our lives.

#6. Grocery Shopping

Bringing our two-year old to the grocery store is chaotic. Gone are the days where she would sit in the cart and look around. Gone are the days where I could just hand her a snack and she would be occupied for a majority of the trip. Bringing Raegan to the store is a rare event because she consumes all energy you have for the day. Last time I brought her, she started off great in the little disease-infested car attached to the cart. "I want to drive, Mommy!" For the first couple minutes, she is cute as a button. She spins the wheel, sings to herself, and makes friends with everyone around. Almost everyone we pass looks at her like she is the most adorable thing in the world. I want to say to them, "Don't let her fool you, when you see us at the check-out line- you will get a glimpse of her true colors." When she is with us, I cannot spend more than 45 seconds looking at any given item. If so, she will get out of the car (last trip she had taken her shoes off in the car so she was now in the aisle with just socks) to try to "help" mommy. And by help, that means putting random items into the grocery cart. I spend half the trip figuring out where she got something so I can put it back on the shelf! One time, I got to the check-out line and found she had stashed three items in her car. She proceeded to give the items to the check-out lady herself so she could "buy them myself." For a little while I was able to occupy her by letting her get out of the cart every time I needed an item needed to be placed in the cart. I told her if she wanted to be a helper, she needed to stay in her car and when Mommy needed her help, THEN she could get out. This worked for most of the trip, but it also took FOR-EV-ER. Basically, never take a two-year-old to the grocery store. It is the worst.

#7. Picking out Clothes

Raegan is an extremely independent child. She knows what she wants. And she knows how to get it. She loves picking out her own clothes. Most times, I am able to manipulate her to wear what I want her to wear. Look how pretty this is. Let's wear sweatpants today. This is the only thing clean! Other times, it becomes a huge ordeal involving lots of tears, screams, and wrestling to get clothes on. Her favorite outfits usually involve mismatched pajamas. Here are a couple gems.

#8. Getting dirty

This is actually not an issue with us. She doesn't care either way- she could be dirty, clean. Whatever as long as she is doing whatever SHE wants to do (which is usually the opposite of what we want her to do.)

#9. Doing Things Themselves

Like I said earlier, my child knows everything and knows how to do everything. Her new thing is lights. She has to be the one to turn the lights on and off. But usually this involves finding a stool so she can reach them. Seriously, sometimes I hate her independence because it makes EVERYTHING a production. She has put her own socks and shoes on. She has to pick out which shoes and underwear to wear. Not only that, but she has to take part in EVERYTHING that we do. If we are cooking, she has to help. If we are on a computer, "I want to type, too!" She has to help walk the dogs. She has to buckle her own seat belt in her car seat. This is the age where parents BEG for alone time... even if it is just to use the bathroom! Gross- one time she even offered to help wipe me. Ummm no.

#10. Manipulation

Raegan is the queen manipulator. She knows exactly who she can get what from. She knows how far she can go. And she is constantly testing this level. She knows how and when to be cute. She knows exactly how long she can whine before we get so frustrated we just give in. If you ever need something done, talk to Raegan. She will figure out a way to get it done. Don't get me wrong- this is an awesome trait. I am extremely proud that she has the brains and the guts to be such an asshole. But, I would rather not be the one being manipulated. As parents, we have to CONSTANTLY be on our toes because she is always one step ahead of us. She totally owns both me and my husband. I am sure she will continue to manipulate us (some times without us even knowing) for a lonnnnnnng time.

Raegan First Year Video

I have been spending all of my free time recently working on Raegan's first year video.

Enjoy!

From one baby to two... Leaving the house

Leaving the House

With one baby: Make sure the diaper bag is stocked with a couple diapers, a snack, and maybe a bottle. Carry the kid to the car, strap her in, and drive away.

With two babies: Make sure the diaper bag is stocked with enough essentials for both of them. Snacks, sippy cup, extra clothes for one. Bottle, diapers, wipes, snacks, food for the other. Look everywhere for keys. Raegan has them. Put shoes and coat on one kid. She walks away. Put shoes and coat on other child. He crawls away. Realize Raegan has already taken her shoes and socks off. Put shoes and socks back on. Notice Rory is working on taking his shoes off. Put them back on. Gather supplies and Rory in your arms. Where is my phone?!? Raegan is in the other room watching a video on the phone. Try to take it. Starts screaming. Try to lure her out the door by promising a snack. She chooses the one that makes the biggest mess. Fine, whatever- let's just get out of here. You are now 10 minutes late because who would have thought it would take that long to get shoes on and walk out the door. Oh yea... it happens every day so basically you are an idiot. You carry the diaper bag and Rory while trying to get Raegan to walk somewhat faster than a snail's pace to the car. She stops to look at everything on the way. You just keep moving and start strapping Rory into the car seat while keeping an eye on Raegan slowly coming down the front steps naming everything she sees. "Look at that tree, Mommy!" Yes, great. I love that you are so verbal- please hurry up and get into the car. Once Rory is strapped in, you go and pick up Raegan to put her in the car. Cue tantrum. "I WANT TO WALK!" You do not give in, which just makes the situation worse. One of the first things a child learns is how to resist a car seat. They learn this at birth. They are experts. The reason kids take so long to learn to read or walk or talk or anything else is because they use all their brain cells figuring out the best way to maneuver their bodies so it is IMPOSSIBLE to strap them into a car seat. Anyway, by now Raegan's body is bent so far backward that it takes two hands to push her hips into the seat, leaving no hands to quickly bring the straps around her arms. Finally after about five minutes and repeated bribes and threats, she is strapped in and the two of you are exhausted. Rory witnessed the entire episode and is now crying because he hates being stationary in the car for more than 30 seconds. You give him the pacifier, give Raegan her snack (even though she does not deserve it) and get ready to drive off. However, you look at the time, see that you are now almost 30 minutes late and realize you are so late it is pointless to even go anymore.


Up soon, from one kids to two: mealtime and bedtime. Reliving this just made me too exhausted....

Traveling with Babies

We just got back from a mini-road trip to visit Great-Grandma and Great-Grandpa and to shower our new baby cousin with lots of love! Before reading this post, keep in mind I am EXTREMELY lucky to have two children who are amazing travelers. I don't know if it is because we started going on long road trips and plane rides before they were 2 months old or if they just love being in the car, but we are very lucky.

This is what our typical road trip is like:

One minute into the ride. "Fruit snacks pwease!" We hand over the fruit snacks. Obviously we do not want to start the trip with a tantrum. Car trips are not the time to parent and discipline. When the toddler is happy, everyone is happy.

Three minutes later, "Snack pwease. Need teddy grahams!" Okay, we actually made it out of our neighborhood! Sure, have some teddy grahams.

By now, Rory is already asleep. We made it to the highway. "Want drink! Want Mommy's drink!" No, you can't have Mommy's drink. Here is your water. "Need ice in my water, Mommy." Uh oh. We don't have ice, baby. Just drink your water. "Okay!" Ahh, disaster averted.

Once the snack and water situation is handled, we make sure she has a couple toys to play with. Raegan will sit in her car seat playing with toys and singing to herself. Finally some peace to enjoy the ride. We turn on the music. "Want MY music, Mommy!" Ahhh. Okay. The itsy bitsy spiderrrrr went up the water spout. We are about 10 miles away from home. Is it too late to turn around and forget about the whole thing??

After one or two songs, Raegan forgets about HER music and continues to play with her toys. We quickly turn off the music before we all go insane. Time to relax.

"Waaaaa!" Rory wakes up and is hungry. Oh, look. We actually made it to Delaware! When he was still nursing, we were lucky to ever make it out of Maryland before he needed to eat. Now it is amazing because he can eat food pouches and snacks and fruit.

We make a quick decision. Keep him satisfied for the short term or stop and eat an actual lunch. Why prolong it? We stop for a food and bathroom break.

Ok, back on the road. We are good now. Everyone has been fed and cleaned. The rest of the trip is usually pretty uneventful. Raegan plays, Rory sleeps. Everyone is happy. Usually we are good for the rest of the trip- at least until the very end. Only once (during a 11 hour trip) have we had to use the ipad or a movie to keep them happy. Having a passenger is awesome to entertain with peek-a-boos, singing, tickling, feeding, talking, and anything else the toddler demands.

The worst part about traveling is all of the STUFF you need to bring. Our family lives all over the place. We are always taking long weekends to visit them. I think there should be a rule: If you want us to visit you, you need to have a few of the essential items at your house so we do not need to travel with them. Anyone that has even the smallest chance of having a baby come stay at their house should have a pack and play, some sort of high chair, a baby gate, a few toys, and books. Okay, I am kidding but that really would be nice.

So, for most road trips, the back of the car is stocked with a pack n play, a travel high chair, a bag of toys and books, a bag of baby food, formula, eating utensils, sippy cups, snacks, and bibs, their suitcase of clothes, and a bag of other necessities such as diapers, wipes, monitors, etc.  It is border-line embarrassing making three trips bringing things into someone's house for a weekend trip. Kids should not need this much stuff.

Another difficult part of traveling: Sleeping. Babies need consistency in their lives. Traveling creates such chaos in their lives. They don't sleep in their own beds. They don't sleep at the normal times. They don't sleep in their normal rooms. They get used to falling asleep in the car. Also, bedtime and nap time routines are completely thrown off. If you are staying at someone's house, you want to be as minimally disruptive as possible. You don't want your kids to be screaming themselves to sleep. But, you also don't want to spend the whole night laying next to them in order for them to fall asleep. If you are in a hotel, you have to be as quiet as possible as you have to stay in the room they are sleeping in. These factors lead you to let them stay up later than they are used to, which makes bedtime (and transitioning to the regular routine at home) that much worse. There is nothing worse than an overtired kiddo. And when traveling, there is no good solution.

Basically, traveling sucks- even when your kids are amazing little travelers. For parents, it is stressful and extremely exhausting. But, for some reason, it doesn't stop me from needing to get away with the kids every couple months!